Sooo DG's party.

Don't read. Lol.

Soo just recently.. on a Sunday something major happened. WEELLL actually I don't know if it's major or not.. but maybe to me it was a bit. Well the most awkward-EST thing happened ever. So I was just hanging out with his little brother and sister and then he came out of the class and I opened my arms to give him a hug.. but then he like rejected it! GRR so then I closed it.. and then he opened HIS to hug me! and I was like okay.. so I hugged him.. lol AND OKAY SO LIKE you know when you hug someone.. the head is in the opposite direction right? WEEEEEELLL THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN THIS TIME.. like when we hugged.. OUR FACE WAS LITERALLY FACE TO FACEE.. and we almost KISSEDD!!! likee wow. Hahhaa I couldn't believe that almost happened.. and then we moved our headsss so then we can have a proper hug.. but then it just so happened to be in the same direction? LOL. and it happened again!!!! omgahh. AND THEN WE WERE LIKE "AHHH" and then we immediately yanked out. Hahhha but then we redid our hug. Soo yeah..if our heads were a little bit closer.. my first kiss woulda gone to him.. hahah. Ohh woow.. and hrmm as a girl.. I always wanted my first kiss to be memorable or something.. Haha i don't know.. lol but I wonder what would of happened if we DID kiss.. you know? It's so weird.. it's like a drama scene. :[ lol...

Then after that happened.. I went to a bday party.. it was all good.. my hair was FINE! Until I played basketball and sweated.. then my hair got all gross and frizzy.. AND HE JUST HAD TO COMEE WHEN I LOOKED UGLY. Gr... well yeah.. at first I talked to his brother more than I did to him.. I thought it was pretty weird.. anyways so yeah.. since I didn't want our friendship to be awkward.. I just sometimes talk to him and like.. make fun of him and stuff. Haha.. when he missed the ball into the hoops. Lol.. and then I sometimes sprayed him with the water gun. But on "accident". Well actually.. I DID SPRAYED IT ON ACCIDENT... but I don't think he thinks so.. Actually.. I think he was annoyed. HAHA oh well.. so yeah.. then we played spoons together. :D And yeah we played with the white plastic one and then he grabbed another spoon? The clear one (it was stronger) and I was like what the hell is he doing? But okay.. whatever. Soo.. when it was my turn to hit his spoon.. he changed it.. and I just hit it like nothing was happening. So when it was his turn.. he changed spoons. And I GOT SO CONFUSE.. I WAS LIKE WHAT?!?!?! LOL.. omg I didn't even notice that he changed the spoons.. well like it never came to me.. and I just retardedly hit his spoon.. when he changed it right in front of my face.. (okay.. this is probably confusing.. but whatever.. it's not meant for something for you to understand then.. hahaah. I'll just reread this when I get older.. and remember exactly what happened..) lol.. ANYWAYS idk, I felt so stupidddd for not realizing it.. hahahaha. it was like a major blonde moment. And okay after that.. me and ML was at the campfire sitting down and playing with it and stuff.. and he joined.. so yeah like he sit acrossed from me.. and stuffs. And I had the water gun.. so i was shooting it at the fire.. and I guess the water shot him and stuff.. so he looked at me and i was like o_o uhh... then dropped the gun.. and pretended it wasn't me LOL.. yeah.. ahha i felt childish for doing that.. lmfao. and then IT HAPPENED AGAIN! And this time i'm like.. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........ then I just handed the gun over to justin.. while he starred at and I starred innocently at him.. lol! Then he looked away.. and I saw him smiled.. :/ it was so adorable.. LOL.. like the kind of smile where.. I made him smiled.. LOL okay hard to explain.. (I was never a good explainer anyways) And soo here is the stick story... and so since everybody had a stick.. I wanted one.. so I yelled out and i yelled out I WANTT A STICK!!! i diddnt expect anybody to reply BUUUT.. HE DID he was like GO GET A STICKKKKK THEN and i was like
YOU GO GET IT FOR MEEE THEN. LOL and then ML..he was sitting right next to me and was like "hey tina.. save my seat, i'll find us both a stick" <--he is like the sweetest person on earth. soo then after he left THAT PERSON got up and then went to the tree and started like jumpingg or smoethingg and was like omg! is he getting a stick for me!??!! and i was like.. naaaahh.. prolly not. so then ML came back with two sticks.. one big one and one small one and he gave me a big one.. haha so then a few secs later THAT PERSON HANDED ME A STICK I WAS LIKE.. uuuuuuh....... but then i just took it.. OMGGG LOLOL it was so cute and so sinceeeee ML had a small onee i gave him back his stick.. and yeah i kept his.. omg it was so weird.. and that whole day.. he sometimes looked at me like he still liked me.. but i dont know.. it's probably my wishfull thinking though.. grr.. and at the stick scene.. when they both handed me a stick.. it was like the drama in My Lucky Star.. when they both took their hands out and offered her to dance.. :/ hahaha. sigh.. I think i like him waaaay too much.. and whenever I talk to my friends.. his name has to be in the conversation at least one time.. grr... and yeah.. i'm a loser.. lately we've been texting.. but not like everyday.. just every other day.. I always find excuses and reasons to text him.. :/ maan.. i dont know what to do with my life.. like i dont think i can imagine myself with another guy other than him.. uuughh so complicated. and it feels so icky and mushy and stuff.. BUT it's true.. -____- i am embarrassed to be saying that. But whatever.. :/ i hate my life. I STILL MISS HIM TERRIBLY. I wanna see him.. :/ days when I dnot text him.. ruins my mood.. like i'm so moody and mean.. and when i do text him.. my days just seem brighter for some odd reason.. ugh!! I sooo dislike myself.. I wanna see if one day me and him is gonna have another chance in the future.. I wonder when we go to the Japan trip.. if anything is gonna happen.. sigh.. his feelings are like.. so unpredictable and stuff. ughh.. he probably likes another girl.. and have a girlfriend by that time.. I'M SUCH A LOSER. I need to stop making my life seem like a drama.. -.- even though its so hard.. WHY DO I MISS HIM SO MUCH!! the song Crush by Rosette is my song to him. It's exactly how I feel.. :/ The only way to make him close to me.. is by telling him that he's my bestfriend.. sigh.. life get's on my nerves.